With reasonable men I will reason. With humane men I will plea. But to tyrants I will give no quarter, nor waste arguments where they will certainly be lost.
— Abolitionist William Lloyd Garrison.
1. No “Both-Sides” to this Stuff.
Bigotry and racism aren’t politics. Stop calling them that in order to suggest that there is a legitimate discourse to be had, with sound arguments for and against. The “against” is Human Decency 101. The “for” bigotry and racism is evil.
I have zero tolerance for “traditional” beliefs about these topics. “Tradition” treated 50% of people like second class citizens because of their ovaries. “Tradition” put millions of our fellow humans in chains because of the color of their skin.
Here I intentionally substitute “traditional” for “conservative.” “Conservative” invokes politics. While there may be today an alignment between conservative politics, “traditional” gender views, and racial animus, these things aren’t necessarily linked. In fact, more Republicans than Democrats voted for the 19th Amendment, giving women the right to vote. Republicans were the party of Lincoln, abolishing slavery while southern Democrats clung to it. These things aren’t politics. They are tools politicians use to divide us.
2. No Quarter. No Equivocation
- If you are against feminism, then you are against equal rights and equal opportunities for women. Bigot. “I prefer a more traditional role for women.” Really? Like when they couldn’t vote, own property, open a bank account, work and live independently? So… bigot.
- If you think “Black Lives Matter” means white lives or “blue lives” don’t, you are refusing to acknowledge how badly people of color are treated in the U.S. Bigot. Would you really feel that much better if BLM instead whimpered “Come on guys, black lives matter too”? Because what they really mean is “For Fucks Sake! Our Lives MATTER! Stop Treating Us Like Shit Just Because We’re Black!”
- If you are fine with anti-Semitism, then you support Jews being harassed and threatened with violence. Bigot.
- If you think gay people living their lives how they choose is somehow a threat to yours, you are incredibly insecure. And if your own insecurity causes you to discriminate against people because of who they choose to love… bigot. If your god tells you to persecute them, then your god is a bigot too. Most people’s gods don’t, and aren’t.
If you’re still reading, especially after that last one, then I assume these things don’t apply to you. But maybe tiny shreds of them once did?
3. Being Honest with Ourselves
I’d be lying if I said I never participated in a few of these. I grew up in a mostly white town in the 80s. We haphazardly dropped gender and homophobic insults all the time. I remember very few racist comments, not because there wasn’t racism in my town, but because there were few POC in that town at that time. It just didn’t come up.
But bigotry was all around us, most conspicuously in the media we consumed. Go watch some movies made in the 70s or 80s — they are shockingly full of sexism, racial stereotypes, and homophobia. Some of the classics are more than problematic. Reels of Bugs Bunny cartoons made between the 40s and 60s (on blast in the 80s) are locked away never to be seen again because they are rife with racism and sexism, not to mention gun violence and substance abuse. 80% of my time in the Army was spent in all-male combat arms units. Surely I let pass and likely participated in some sexist conversations that in the moment just seemed like harmless banter. With no women around for miles, weren’t these conversations the definition of “victimless crime?”
When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
— 1 Corinthians
(In case you jumped to the conclusion that I reject all religion, step back. There are beautiful quotes and much wisdom contained within the world’s religions.)
I grew up. More on that in a future post I’ll call “Grown-Ass Adult.”
Abandoning Bigotry is an Individual Act
It’s good to evolve. It’s okay to be honest about your past, to admit mistakes. I’ve made countless mistakes in my life about this and other things. Learn, get better, and move on. Don’t dwell on your mistakes. Take new ownership of building a world where justice and equality outshine bigotry. Get in the ring. 🥊
Inspiration for your own personal evolution
The journey of Benjamin Franklin from slave owner to abolitionist.
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