Hardship is relative, not absolute
If you’re not familiar, “degree of difficulty” is a concept in many judged sports (gymnastics, diving, snowboarding, etc) where the athlete gets a higher score for attempting something (a move, trick, dive, etc) more difficult. All other things being equal, landing a backside 720 (see Chloe Kim above) is a lot more difficult than a frontside 180, and appropriately it earns a higher score.
Now think about trying to launch a startup as white man and as a black woman. It’s hard for both, but all other things being equal, pulling off that trick as a black woman is astronomically more difficult. How hard? Per CrunchBase, a leading news on startups and venture capital, women of color secured only 0.43% of all venture capital funding in 2020. It’s hard to launch a startup without funding.
In fundamental areas of our lives like education, career advancement, housing, and even healthcare, it’s a lot harder to receive equal treatment if you aren’t white, male, and straight. Healthcare, you ask? According to the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, women of color are 2–3X more likely than white women to die giving birth.
Not discounting your hardships or successes
If you are a straight white guy, I’m not going to tell you your life has been easy. Mine hasn’t been. Physical and spiritual scars document my decades of lumps, knock downs, mistakes, and misfortune. I’ve failed. At times I’ve felt insecure and threatened — physically, psychologically, and financially. Life is hard.
Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome. — Booker T. Washington
I have also accomplished a lot in my life, and if you are reading this, I bet you have too. Life is also beautiful. We can acknowledge that many of our triumphs would have been even MORE difficult if we had to contend with additional individual and structural biases. To do so doesn’t diminish our accomplishments or the beauty of our lives one bit.
Really try to walk a mile in another (wo)man’s shoes, particularly those of someone who isn’t white, male, and straight. All our lives have regular ups and downs, but it’s impossible to deny that they face a whole set of extra challenges, impediments we don’t have to content with. For me, it’s plain to see their degree of difficulty is much higher than mine, even if mine is hard too.
Turn your wounds into wisdom. — Oprah
Leveling the field
But it’s not enough to simply acknowledge the uneven playing field. We literally would accept this in youth sports, so why do we accept it metaphorically in life? Let’s make the scoring more objective. Let’s eliminate the biased and flawed judges, referees, and umpires (the worst parts of sports). Let’s make it so everyone has an equal shot at the title. Let’s even out the degree of difficulty.
I come back to the bravery and power you have within you. I implore you to pick up a tool and help solve the problems of bias and inequity of opportunity that have ossified in America. Our hard-earned successes have given us wisdom and means.
Wisdom + means + the power of our position = unmatched power to change the world.
You are already a heavyweight fighter. Get it the ring.🥊
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